06 June 2013

Imma Be Better

Not entirely sure why, but the chorus from this is running on constant loop in my brain cell at the moment.  Probably a hint that I should break out my copy of The Black Eyed Peas Experience and get my backside in gear again.  

In all seriousness, though, I really am blessed. 

Without my beloved, I wouldn't be able to know what it was like to get to remove a huge stressor from our lives. It's amazing just how very much stress affects physical and mental health. 
  • The teeth grinding/biting down that was causing a tremendous amount of mouth pain?  Gone...and it's only been 6 days. 
  • The constant, gnawing headaches which had me taking well over 10 Advil a day? Gone. 
  • Energy levels which had disappeared into the abyss?  Slowly but surely returning. 
  • Sleep, which had been eluding me during the normal sleepy-time hours? Returned. I can now go to bed and stay there, asleep, for more than 6 hours at a time! 
  • Depression and anxiety? Gone. Medication for said mood messer-uppers? Also gone. 
And no, I'm not sitting around scarfing down bon bons....(though I do still watch my one and only soap during my predetermined lunch hour)....I'm doing things. Being productive.

In case you're wondering what exactly caused so much stress? It was a job....a job, itself, that I loved, surrounded by people whom I did not. People that made it impossible to have a stress-free day...people that made it impossible to keep seeing things in a positive light.  No, I can't blame THEM for my responses TO them, because all in all, it was up to me to control how I chose to handle the constant negativity, lying and backstabbing. 

Instead of choosing to continue fighting a very losing battle, I chose me. See, I was starting to move in a direction of 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em' and 'when in Rome, do as the Romans' and I DETESTED that I was so weak that I would give in to it. But I did...and I had to get away from it.  

I have seen the Bigger Picture and it is this....me, utilizing my brain for writing, and for greater causes such as helping animals, namely Pit Bulls....inspired by people like these: 

And, in my spare time, taking on the monumental task of learning to be a better wife. Inspired mainly by my lovely sister-in-law, who just has it together and by people like this: 

Sometimes, you discover things, not because you need them in THAT moment, but because they will come in particularly handy at a later date.  Now is that time. I've got the time and the urge, and so I will get way better at doing what I am supposed to do.  

I guess, what it really boils down to is this:  

If your life is full of negativity, stress, phsyical ailments (headaches, high blood pressure, anxiety, constant anger, etc.), take a step back and review.  Look at the contributors to all these things and decide whether or not there is something that can be done to alleviate them.  No, it's not always possible to just leave a job and start over, hitting the ground running...but there are things that can be done.  

IF not now, when?  

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